After he retired, our father, Scott Keyes, turned to writing poetry: serious, as well as light verse. Dad had always wanted to do this, but first had to complete his career as an urban and regional planner. From 1977 till 1991 he sent an annual booklet of poems to his many friends.
In honor of his memory, we are devoting a section in our respective websites to the best of Scott Keyes's verse. We will be gradually uploading his poetry, starting here with 28 of our favorites from his first collection, The Keyes Garden of Verses, and 12 from A Second Helping. (There are also a links at the bottom to the complete set of each one, though some might be a bit dated.)
Gene and Ralph Keyes http://www.genekeyes.com http://www.ralphkeyes.com
(with encouragement from our other two siblings, Stephen and Nicolette)
Big Busyness Whenever I think that
I might like to snooze I'm stopped in my tracks by That list of to-do's |
Two Loves I love to read till
Late at night. I love to watch the Dawning. But when I try them Both I find I spend the whole day Yawning. |
The Gardener I never like to
Start from seeds Because I'm Tenderhearted. I find that I can Never thin Them out when they Have started. |
||
Pack Rat I
I never like to Throw away things Because I've learned To my sorrow That anything I Dispose of to-day I'm certain to want Tomorrow. |
Pack Rat II
What I'll toss when I run out of space I'm not quite sure That I see But if nothing else Is disposable I guess it will have To be me. |
Coming of Age A savage may
Achieve manhood By putting a ring Through his nose. But the intellectual Does it By grinding out Scholarly prose. |
||
Give Me A Hint I
I always know what I'd like to get Except when it comes December. But darn it — right at The crucial time I just can't seem to Remember. |
Give Me A Hint II
Whenever you ask what I'd like for Christmas Why do I always find myself List - less ? |
Room Mate My daughter has
Moved in with Someone to Cherish But since he's No in-law I feel rather Bearish. |
||
Hard To Please Two things really
Have me beat. One is cold, The other, heat. |
Kitchen Drudge A man who retires
Soon understands What his wife always meant by Dishpan hands. |
Double Whammy I love my neighbor's
Well groomed lawn But not his Power mower. It's nice he has A stereo But I wish he'd play it Lower. |
||
Golden Years It's so wonderful when
You're in my arms And the tip of your cigarette's Glowing And gently you put your Lips on mine And between us the smoke is Flowing. Soon we'll be on the Other side, and Just think — there we'll Be able To light up again in the Same old way And forget what it says on The label. |
Fellow Traveller I shudder whenever
I open the door And see you scuttle Across the floor. Yet really I think that I should ask why Since you've been around Much longer than I. You've seen species come And you've seen them go And I'm sure in that stubby Black body you know That you will reflect On the human condition Long after we've blown Ourselves to perdition. |
On a Certain bomber I never saw
A purple cow I never hope to See one. But I'll tell you This much anyhow — Rather that than B - 1. |
||
Now They Tell Me New, bigger, better —
Have I been had ? Was last year's product All that bad ? |
Big Sale It's a curious thing
I can't quite comprehend When they tell me I'll save more The more that I spend. |
Born Loser In guessing which
Check-out line Will move Quicker Experience Tells me I'm Not a good Picker. |
||
Strange Interlude Peculiar things happen
to water consumption Between "Now this message ..." And program resumption. |
Laxative Commercial I never would have
Suspected it — So many people So full of shit. |
On-The-Job-Training When I see those
Help Wanted ads that say "Cook — No Experience Needed" I remember the Restaurant meals I've tried To eat and haven't succeeded. |
||
Gay I used to like the
Simple words, but Now-a-days, my gracious I've had to shift to Sprightly, animated or Vivacious. |
Robbery I wish they hadn't
Stolen away That word which means You're happy — gay. |
More Robbery And another word they've
Stolen away — Just look what "Explicit..." Means to-day. |
||
Disdain I don't have
Much time For poems that Don't rhyme. |
Warning Whenever they tell you
The verse is free Prepare yourself for some Prose-etry. |
Triple Threat Parkinson's Law and the
Peter Principle Appear to make Murphy's Law Almost invincible. |
||
Fifty / Fifty
|
2 | M | a | c | h | i | n | e
| R | e | a | d | a | b | l | e| | I | | w | o | n | d | e
| r | | i | f | | m | y |
| P | o | e | m | s | | w | o | u | l | d | | b | e | | C | u | t | e | r | | I f | | t | h | e | y | | w | e | r | e | | R | e | a | d | a | b | l | e | | b | y | | a | | C | o | m | p | u | t | e | r | . | |
5 Clutter
I know my desk is A mess. It's been so since way Back when. I ought to clean it I guess But how will I find Things again? |
6 Close-Knit
No matter how fair Or foul the weather My paper clips always Hang together. |
10 Gresham's Law
We live in a Peculiar age When using words is All the rage. And it really is A thing to see When they replace Reality. |
19 Please Fence Me In
Somehow I just can't Comprehend Space and time that Have no end. |
20 Responsibility
If saving the world Were not so hard I think I'd have time To mow the yard. |
24 Rabbit Food
Knowing that rabbits Have their needs I offer them my Crop of weeds. But exercising Rabbit power They dine instead on Cauliflower |
26 The Great Indoors
My neighbors? Yes, I believe They are there Though I'm never Sure with their Central air. |
32 Carcinogens
I think that I would Get on the ball And worry, if I could Remember them all. |
40 Watch Your Step
I know that walking is Better by far But I only feel safe at The wheel of a car. |
47 Absolute
Certainty Cats that Scratch couches Will hear from Us grouches. |
48 Income Tax
I'll have to take A month off I guess To do that research For the IRS. |